A Day Along The River

This past Sunday, after we had dropped the girl off for her week at summer camp (so exciting!), we figured we should take advantage of being along the Chesapeake on such a beautiful afternoon! We ended up in quaint, historic Chestertown, MD, a place we hadn't visited for many years....Liam and I, of course, couldn't resist taking some photos of the charming old houses along the quiet streets...

and we even stopped and talked with some of the locals..... We had lots of fun walking around and just taking everything in... So many lovely historic buildings with tons of original architectural detail to admire,  and the cooling breeze off the river was so refreshing.....as were the lovely gardens tucked here and there. A lovely summer day spent in the best way possible!

5 Signs You Are Ready To Run Away From Home

Do you remember when you were a kid, and you were so mad at your brother or fed up with your parents that you would dream of just packing your bags and running away?

 "After I'm gone awhile, they'll miss me & see that they were WRONG, and I was RIGHT...and they will be SORRY!"

Whomever was right or wrong, juvenile or mature in these situations, hormonal or balanced...we dreamed up our tactic of escape because we felt powerless to change what was going on. It was a power play, a way for our not-yet-grown selves to dream of gaining control and make things go our way.

The funny thing is, in my line of work I meet a lot of adults who have in essence been running away from home for years--they just have never packed a suitcase or left a tear-stained note on the fridge.  What are the characteristics of a runaway who never actually runs away? Let's talk about some of the earmarks of such a person...

1. That Sinking Feeling- It starts when the key goes in the lock upon returning home, or maybe even when she first pulls in the driveway--this feeling gives way to....
2. General Discomfort--A real dis-ease when at home, because, after all, home doesn't feel "homey,"but rather just disappointing and overwhelming: 'That whole pretty house thing that other people have just isn't possible for me.' This belief leads to the following key characteristic...
3. Avoidance--Not looking around, not engaging with her environment. For the runaway, most of the house becomes a glorified hallway quickly walked through, leading to one or two spaces that don't feel as disappointing or drab because once she's there she can...
4. Distract--The only rooms that have time spent in them are the ones where she can check out by sleeping, mentally go somewhere else by plopping in front of a screen, or escape by diving into a book. And the last tell-tale sign is....
5. Absence/"Hostess With The Leastest"-- The runaway spends a lot of time everywhere but at her house. Meals out, activities that take her elsewhere--anywhere, really--are all preferable to spending time at home. The runaway rarely offers to host friends for get-togethers, since she doesn't even know how to extend everyday hospitality to herself.

What the runaway hasn't learned yet is that her power doesn't come from avoidance or escape--which really aren't powerful things at all.  BUT by making the choice to engage and work at changing things that hold her back in her home, she can indeed be mighty.

Do you see any of the qualities of the runaway in yourself? If so, have you thought about the costs involved in living in a house that doesn't feel like home? One very simple and concrete way to estimate them is to take your mortgage payment and divide it by the number of rooms you have in your house. For example, if you mortgage is around $1500/month and you have 10 rooms (only two of which you marginally enjoy spending time in) your frustration and disappointment are costing you $1200 a month--and this number doesn't even represent the costs of all that restaurant food, gas put in the car so you can escape, oh...and the years of enjoyment that never happened.

What would it feel like to turn any corner in your house and feel your heart swell with pride? What would it be like to love being at home because it feels so welcoming?? What would it be worth to you if your home added something amazing to the quality of your life, rather than feeling it was only a disappointing drain?

If you have spent years as a runaway, it is time to come back home! Your house is too big of an investment to waste any more time, money or energy not loving every inch of it.

Remember, the power is in your hands!

Mulch Ado About Nothing

Well, last week I ordered 6 yards of mulch, and set aside this past weekend to spread it out among the gardens. SO EXCITING. After all of the construction around here (results to be revealed later this week!), I was really looking forward to getting the beds around the house looking their best again. Mother Nature cooperated and just gave me a nice sprinkle shower now and then with some cooling raindrops--she knows I can't take the heat, so this cooler, cloudier theme she was working was just perfect.

Sometime on Saturday I remember banging my ankle with the rake. OUCH. Considering all the other bumps and bruises, aches and pains I usually have after so much physical labor, I didn't think much of it....just carried on. Much to do! Mulch to do! lol.

However, sometime around 4pm on Sunday, I thought "hmmm...., something doesn't feel right." And today my ankle looks like it belongs more on a baby elephant than on me.

(I would include a picture, but the medical textbook aesthetic isn't what I was going for. ewwwwww)

So, I guess this afternoon I will have to take some time out to go to Urgent Care. I feel like that is our family's second home these past few months--not exactly the summer cottage I had envisioned. Hmpfh. 

Hope YOUR week is off to a good start and here's hoping all this swelling is no. big. deal.

Signed,

Gimpy The Designer

A "Trip In Vain"

Okay. So this is where I was SUPPOSED to be earlier this week...

Ahhhh, Asheville, North Carolina. Such a beautiful place.

Instead, I was here:

Staring at signs like this....Making faces that looked like this...while leaning on counters and talking to people who had talked to MANY other people who were far more upset and angry than I was. No fun. 

These pictures were actually taken the day AFTER I was supposed to fly out of Philadelphia. I had spent 13 hours in the airport the day before, getting on and off the same plane that had some weird mechanical problem that eventually resulted in the authorities that be deciding that the flight was. indeed. cancelled.

Great.

I had gotten no sleep and no satisfaction. There were no other flights available to get me to Asheville, and as I stood at the counter pictured above, I learned two things: First, that my luggage had actually gone ahead without me to Asheville (thanks for throwing salt in the wound), and second, as the baggage agent informed me, my cancelled trip is in the airline business called a "trip in vain."

As my daughter would say, "well, NO DIP."

I was a bit frustrated, to say the least, and SO disappointed to have missed my business retreat that I have looked forward to for MONTHS.

However, it is always best to look at the bright side and make lemonade from lemons whenever possible. Before going to the airport on Sunday afternoon, we dropped our son off for his first time ever away from home--two weeks at sleep away camp!!!

This was my husband's favorite site from the day. Every time he sees this picture he laughs. AAAAND since I was home on Monday, and it was a gorgeous summer evening, we decided to go take in a ball game. G even brought one of her 'BFF's'--lol. So fun. GO BLUE ROCKS!! That is some pretty cool, sweet, & refreshing lemonade.

Now and Zen

A while back,  during a conversation about the frustrations of house upkeep, a friend shared a practice she employs to help keep her sane during the craziest of crazy times...

As she described it, there is one place in her home (I believe it was the top of her nightstand) which, through thick and thin, come hell or high water, is always a lesson in simplicity, is clear of dust and clutter, and has just a few of her very favorite things artfully arranged on it.  This is her Zen Space. 

While the rest of the household may be falling into disarray with the family's comings and goings, she knows she can sit on her bed, take a few breaths, look at her Zen Space, and find a little peace amid the cacophony of clutter and chaos. What a fantastic idea...

SO, you guessed it! This is our quick assignment for the month!!

Where in your house can YOU create a Zen Space?? First, pick a small surface that is easy to keep cleared & dusted. Second, make sure that only a few special things are on it--maybe a special picture and some fresh flowers--nothing else allowed. 

When things are feeling out of whack and out of control around the house, focus on this one clean, clear spot that is well within your control.  Take a couple of deep breaths and take a minute to relax--you will be so glad you did.

Remember these assignments are supposed to be fun & only take you 15 minutes or less...so set your timer, and carve out a little peaceful space for yourself!