I'm going to ask you to try something new...just for a little while

I’m sure this is a scenario we can all relate to:

It has been a crazy, busy, tiring few weeks, and there is A LOT to do around your house that you haven’t had a minute (maybe not even a second) to get to.

The front hall is a mess, the sink is full of dishes, the laundry hamper is overflowing, and the piles of mail are teetering, threatening to topple and scatter all over the floor.  Maybe the refrigerator even smells.

What is the FIRST thing you do?

Now, be honest.

 Sure you could dive right in, tidy up, wash up & straighten ‘til things shine again. But I would be willing to bet you start somewhere else…

More often that not, it seems our first step when we are overwhelmed and tired is to start by criticizing ourselves –sometimes really maliciously--for not keeping on top of things, for not being perfect.

YUCK.

But this month, I am going to ask you to try something new.

For the next 30 days, I want you to check in with what you are saying to yourself, and stop dead in your tracks if you are being mean or judgmental.

Your homework for this month is to start with love.

When you start with negativity (and we often aren’t even aware that we are doing this) we are directing our energy towards what we DON’T want, and actually making things worse. We wouldn’t encourage a child by tearing her down, so why do we think this will help us to create a better outcome for ourselves?

SO, start with love--whatever the task.

If you feel upset or overwhelmed, take a deep breath and say out loud:

“I am starting with love.”

It IS the MOST powerful force in the universe, after all. :)

You will be fueled to get things done quickly, & peacefully and have energy for so much more as well.

In order for your home to be a place of caring and nurturing, it cannot be a yardstick by which you measure your worth or with which you flog yourself for not being perfect.

Easier said than done, I know.

Just remember—for the next month, start with love. 

That's what I am going to do--and I am sending love your way, too, dear friends!

Is your house the right size for you?

Maybe you have endured years of cramped quarters, a kitchen that never functioned well, and a family room that your whole family doesn't really fit in.

Very. Frustrating. 

Perhaps you have been dreaming of the addition you want to put on the back of your house with sunshine streaming through new large windows, washing over the miles of new counter space in the renovated kitchen, ample space for family gatherings and holiday parties, and maybe a new master suite.....

But as we know, bigger isn't always better, and over the nearly 10 years I've been in business, this is the crossroads where I love to meet with my clients and help them figure out what actually is holding their house back, exactly what is going to make the biggest difference in how their home functions for them, and help them think about their house in a whole new way. 

Adding more square footage absolutely can fix many problems and is SO EXCITING, but first, as your devoted House Whisperer, there are things we can consider together to be sure that we are on the right track as we plan your renovation. 

First, let's talk about ALL the rooms in your house and how you are living in them. For example, you may have rooms in your house that are seldom used, are not really furnished, or that you simply don't like.  

Read the following statements and see if they are accurate truths about you and your house right now:

• I (or someone in my family) uses each room in our house at least once a week.
• I feel proud of the rooms I have and feel good when I spend time in them.
• The rooms in my house relate well to one another, and there is a sense of flow throughout.
• I think my house is beautiful and reflects who I am and how I would like to live my life.
• Accomplishing tasks in my house is easy, since the spaces are well organized and well designed.

If you feel that all of the above statements are true of your house, and you are still ready to build on, then I would say it is the right choice. BUT if there are existing spaces that aren't earning their keep, then that is space that could potentially be re-imagined and repurposed before adding more. 

It is always my mission to help you thoughtfully and intentionally improve your house so that you will have something of beauty, value and quality when you are finished--and I think it is often a good thing to question whether or not  bigger will be better when it comes to your house. Having a smaller amount of house that delights you with its attention to detail and fine materials can be so much more satisfying that a lot of house that bores you and surrounds you with tons of square footage. 

So, is your house the right size for you? Even if it feels cramped right now, it might not be the size that is frustrating you, but rather how well each space is designed and how well it is being used. Take a step back and look at the whole picture, and you might find some creative solutions that can make a huge difference in how your home shelters and nurtures you with the space it already has. 

A Little House Therapy For You

This week I thought it would be fun to talk about how the rooms in your house get along--both with each other and with you.  

If your rooms flow one to the next, and feel fantastic to spend time in, then that is wonderful. Congrats! You have a relationship that many would envy! 

But, if your rooms are small, halting spaces that are disjointed and closed off from one another-- and you feel frustrated and cramped when in them-- then it may be time to think about how we can improve this very important relationship in your life. :)

One solution for a home that feels cramped is to investigate ways to open up interior views from one room to the next. Long sight lines, especially diagonal ones, give the feeling of more space without changing the footprint of the rooms involved at all. 

Before I did this for a living, in my own house a small front hall had frustrated me for years.  I had a feeling that the room's original layout had been tampered with because it just felt wrong. 

Instead of a graceful, Victorian-era entrance, it seemed like a pokey space-- an afterthought with very little elbow room and no charm at all. 

Sure enough, after closer inspection, we realized that the wall was not original but probably had been added in the 1970's...(by the way, this discovery was more exciting for me than if I had won the lottery. There was a lot of jumping up and down and clapping as I took these pictures back in 2005. :) True story).

The small doorway that had been added, with its low header and cramped feeling, completely blocked the view of one of the nicest architectural features of our home--the staircase--and made both spaces feel so much smaller. 

SO, you know that wall had to go! 

With the wall removed, the dining room and front hall were able to relate to each other once again and share light, space, and a feeling of openness--all hallmarks of a healthy relationship. 

As you can see, nothing has changed in the dimensions of these spaces, but your perception of the amount of space that there is, is very, very different.

Widening doorways, opening portions of walls for interior "windows," or removing portions of walls altogether are all great ways to help your home live larger (with the help of a knowledgable contractor and designer, of course!). Certainly this is more involved than just moving a few pieces of furniture, but if you are frustrated by what feels like a cramped abode, then this option is far less expensive than adding on.

Remember, no room in your home ever acts alone, but interacts and converses with the other areas around it, and what kind of dialog they have has a huge impact on how your house feels to you.  Encouraging a good relationship between the rooms in your house can make your house live so much larger than the number of square feet between your walls!  

A Quick 'Before & After'

Just a few months ago, I purchased a simple, small vintage chair from a consignment shop that I love...

Filled with excitement, I texted the above photo to my husband and explained that I had found the *perfect* little chair for our new sitting room that we had been working on. 

The texts that followed said things like:

"Did you buy it already?"

"Will they allow you to return it?"  

and other questions that let me know that he was totally onboard.

HA.

(I know these are the moments that he must question my sanity--and probably his own for choosing to marry me-- but that's ok... After all, what is marriage without a little excitement, a few design challenges--and $50 secondhand furniture??)

I am pleased to say my little find has been re-imagined and reupholstered, and is now happily situated in our new favorite room in the house, making the most out of a cozy corner.

Soon I will have photos of the whole room to show you, however I hope this little snippet inspires you to see new possibilities, even if something seems old, drab or worn out.

Happy Spring!

Forging Your Foundation

This past week, something VERY EXCITING happened! 

A project that has been in the works since last summer has taken flight...

(an apt metaphor, since this new space is specifically designed for the feathered members of my client's family: it is an aviary in the making!)

This new space is able to grow wings and fly because it started with its feet firmly planted on the ground, not only with its solid cinderblock foundation, but also the strong foundational ideas that formed its design.

Not all of us start with such a specific idea or need for a room, but taking the time to identify WHAT YOU NEED A SPACE TO DO FOR YOU is the key to building and creating areas in our homes that function effortlessly while at the same time looking beautiful. 

This week I encourage you to think about the spaces in your house--especially the rooms you aren't very fond of, the ones you find frustrating to spend time in, or the areas where clutter has taken over.

I would bet that these are places where no one has ever made a clear, descriptive list of jobs that the space is supposed to accomplish.

For example in my house, my home office is here to give me a quiet, inspiring, comfortable space to create away from the hustle and bustle of the rest of the household. When I state this purpose clearly, I know that piles of paper needing to be filed or items waiting to be placed in attic storage are roadblocks to the room's purpose--distractions that when they come up (as they often do) need to be dealt with right away, so that I can fully enjoy the space and use it to its full potential. 

I am sure you can think of similar hurdles in your house, SO try these three steps and see how they change things in your home:

1. Forge your room's foundation by stating its purpose clearly, including how you want it to make you feel. Write this description/purpose down so you can reference it as needed.  

2. Next get about the business of removing things that are in the way, that don't help things to flow as they should regarding the room's purpose--i.e. extraneous furniture & items that belong elsewhere, pieces that don't function well or are frustrating each time you use them. 

3. Finally, add things that will help the room to do what you need it to do with ease,  as well as decorative touches that will nurture you day in and day out with beauty.