Your Monthly Homework Assignment--Get Smart!

It wasn't all THAT long ago that we thought a "smart phone" looked something like the above picture. Seems laughable now, right? But, did you know that that bit of technology you carry around in your pocket is one of the best tools to make life in your house better....

"HOW IS THAT??" you ask? Read on for our quick assignment of the month!!

There are three tools already on your phone that I want you to try making use of over the next month--and once you start taking advantage of them, you will never look back:

1. The Timer: Whenever you find yourself not wanting to make the bed, finish the dishes, sort the mail, or any other mundane task, say to yourself: "I totally don't want to do this right now...but I will work on it for just ___ minutes." Then set your timer for 3, 5, 10, or 15 minutes and work hard until it goes off, knowing your "get out of jail" buzzer is going to go off verrry soon. You will be amazed at how much you will accomplish, and yet not feel so very burdened.
2. The Camera: Not sure why a room is bothering you?? Take some pictures of it, and you will see things in a whole new light. I wrote a post about this a while back, sure to make you chuckle, if you want to read more on this one.
3. The Notes: How many times have you gotten to the store only to realize that your list is at home on the counter?? Or you have the list, but forgot to put some important item on it? UGH. No more of this! Create an always present "Grocery List" on your phone that you add to whenever something comes to mind, & back things out of the list as they are purchased. On my phone, I also have a "Target List" that is perpetually waiting for things to be added, since this is the other store I frequent.  Add whatever makes sense for your household, and never have to remember those annoying scraps of paper again.

A Room Of Her Own

It would be great to take over your husband's office...the room you've been eyeing for a while and dreaming of making your own, wouldn't it??  

Well, maybe...but what to do with it once you had it?

Now that he's moved out and only the existing furniture (and clutter that no one wants to claim) is left, somehow it doesn't seem as promising anymore... 

This was exactly the situation when I got the call from one of my favorite clients. She was worried that maybe she had made a mistake. Would the room ever be the feminine, artsy space she hoped it could be??

Well, as you know, I love this kind of challenge. Time to roll up my sleeves and get to work!

Now one wonders if the room ever could have been the austere, stark place it once was....

Using the existing rug to form our color palette, we found new office furniture that offered beautiful display space as well as a more feminine flavor.

There is nothing more important when making a room uniquely yours than surrounding yourself with things you love. Accents throughout the room focus on my client's love of sewing, reading, and, of course, her family (her new grandson in particular)...

We commissioned local artist Jessica Eldredge to make four original cut paper collages to adorn the walls.

Jessica's one-of-a-kind pieces made with lovingly hand-dyed papers, are reminiscent of quilt squares and colorful buttons--the perfect centerpiece for the space. The sewing machine on which my client sewed for hours as a teenager has a prominent place in the room, and over it is hung a collection of beautiful family portraits...

Finding the perfect items to create a cozy reading nook was the next challenge. We found a set of vintage chairs with a matching ottoman. All were reupholstered to compliment the room...

and they are sooooo comfortable. Seems that everyone in the house now wants to sit in HERE rather than the living room because of the soothing atmosphere and cheerful seating.

Now, where there once was little color or coziness, there is a space that is beautiful, nurturing, bright and joyful. What a wonderful blessing!

Beware-This Could Happen To YOU!!-- The Dreaded Mushroom Effect

Well, it has been a craaaazy couple of weeks...starting with my 14 year old being hospitalized on Memorial Day (he is thankfully home now and on the mend--we are so grateful!), followed by construction starting this week on our own house (more on this soon). SO, I decided I needed to reread the article below which I wrote last year. I am hoping it might be helpful to you too!:  

So, a couple of weeks ago I received a text from my cousin that went something like this...

"Painted the living room....

I now want to get rid of everything I own."

I had to chuckle. Has this ever happened to you?

You start with what would seem like a quick fix or decor update, and the next thing you know you are longing to change everything about that room, the next room, and maybe even the color of the flowers that are planted outside near your mailbox.

It is something I will call (da da da dummmm)

The Mushroom Effect...(evil laugh)....

It has happened to the best of us. We want to make a positive change, and the next thing we know we are rethinking things that never bothered us before.

My cousin lives in a huge (aka tiny) apartment in Brooklyn Heights, NY with her husband and three year old son. Their 650 square feet (considered spacious by NYC standards) has to be everything to everyone...a challenge for sure.

(the living room seating is also their guest accommodations, a sometime home office, and always the favorite spot for the cat to lie in the sun....)

And I have to say I think this propensity to question everything is a very good thing. Change is good, right?? When we tear a room apart to paint or reorganize, we have an opportunity to see things in a new light.

One just has to be careful not to throw the baby out with the bathwater... There are pitfalls that quickly get one in over their head--let's talk about how to make sure that doesn't happen:

• Start With A Plan: I know, DUH, right? Sorry if I sound like a broken record, but having a detailed scope in mind at the start, and a specific budget that won't stress you out too much later on, is the best way to keep yourself from getting carried away when emotions run high, or when you start drinking wine to make the work go faster.
• Try To Identify Your True Feelings: If you are like my cousin, and find yourself disgusted and disgruntled mid-project (or perhaps angry with your significant other) have a heart to heart with yourself. Is it really the room? Its contents? The paint color? HIM? OR are you just really stressed out by the fact that everything is in disarray?? It can be a combination of all of these things, but be sure to recognize how stressful and unsettling renovations are....it is hard to feel happy and peaceful in the middle of chaos.
• Play With Changes That Don't Cost A Dime: Move furniture around and create a new layout, bring in artwork from another room for a fresh look, get rid of at least 10 objects from the space that probably weren't being used anyway--these are all ways of improving the space that are FREE. Amazing.
• Make Sure You Finish What You Started: Don't allow yourself to be distracted by all these other things that now seem to need your attention. You started out wanting to change A, so don't start on B until A is completed. A room littered with unfinished projects will be more frustrating than one that isn't perfectly decorated. Trust me, I know. My cousin's apartment in still in flux, but I feel confident that the result will be very good. Meanwhile, I am here when she needs me...as I am for you....to help with vexing design questions, and organizational conundrums..

Diminished

Diminished. That is the word they would use to describe the lung sounds that my son had on his right side....It was a difficult week to say the least. My son was diagnosed with a collapsed lung on Memorial day, was admitted to the hospital, and had surgery on Wednesday...It was shocking and scary. My head is still spinning from the events of last week-- I have to say that I have a whole new appreciation for how important environment and design is during stressful times. It is a part of what I do--working with medical offices to make sure their spaces are soothing and peaceful for their clients--and now I know just how instrumental these elements are in helping one feel hopeful and supported.

I am so grateful to have been in an area that has such an exemplary children's hospital that has a true understanding of this and does all it can to make its patients and their families comfortable. A I DuPont Hospital for Children was an AMAZING place, and I will be forever grateful for the wonderful care they gave my son. The thing is, that my husband and I felt cared for too--what a gift. When things were too overwhelming, when you felt you needed a break or just a minute to step away, you could walk down the hall to the Family Resource Center.... In this lovely room with soothing colors and soft twinkling lights you could have a free cup of coffee, take a shower, use the computers, or look through their library, you could take a breath.  It was such a blessing to have a quiet, restful place to go, even for just 10 minutes or so, during such a stress-filled time.

In the regular hallways and rooms of the hospital, there were cheerful colors and whimsical artwork. It made me smile.

On Saturday, my birthday, we were told that my son was able to go home--the best birthday present ever.  My husband and I agreed that ALL hospitals should be filled with color and joy despite the fact that so many sad, painful and scary things can happen there. We didn't feel as diminished as we could have... but rather uplifted and hopeful because of the support and consideration we were given as a family, the highly skilled and compassionate medical care that was given to my son, and because of the lovely, serene, lighthearted spaces that surrounded us.

Your House: Do You Feel Something Is Missing??

Sometimes, no matter what we add--whether it be more furniture, different accessories, or a new paint color--the rooms in our houses can still feel empty and uncomfortable. Something is missing--but what the heck is it?  Figuring this out can seem daunting--and it is certainly frustrating to feel that you have tried everything, perhaps over many, many years of living in a house, and STILL it doesn't feel like home.

So, the best way for me to explain your problem is to say that there is a lack of intimacy in your home.

OKAY, OKAY....before you roll your eyes and stop reading, LET ME EXPLAIN...

 

When I talk about intimacy as it relates to your house, I am not talking about a Dr. Ruth kinda thing, I am talking about a quality that exists when a house is set up in such a way that it truly supports and even enhances how we live. When it is present, intimacy gives us that feeling of being "at home"--and we sense it at a soul-deep level.

Hopefully I haven't lost you out of frustration or doubt. If you are still with me, let's go over some concrete ideas that each of us can implement to capture this essential element of intimacy and make ourselves a home:

• Your Furniture--no matter the size of the room they are in, sofas and chairs in a living space should be close together and oriented toward one another. Yes, I know the TV is all important, but if we want our homes to FEEL GOOD, our rooms have to be set up so that we can easily sit down and have a CONVERSATION. Intimacy can't exist without relationships.
• Your Rooms-- please ignore what your rooms were named when you bought the house.  For example, if your "dining room" is only used once a year for a formal dinner, and the rest of the time it sits empty (except for papers and other clutter) then be honest with your house and yourself about your needs. Maybe a "home office" or a "craft room" would be a better use of all that square footage. Change the name and tell the truth. Honesty creates intimacy.
• Your Emotions--what brings you joy? What do you find beautiful? To feel tied to our houses, they need to connect with us on an emotional level. Again, honesty is important as we look through our possessions and evaluate whether or not they make us feel good and whether we feel they are are an accurate representation of how we want to live and what we find meaningful and lovely. Getting emotional connects our hearts to where we live--and intimacy is created.
• Your "Personal Grooming"--if you were preparing to go out to dinner with a spouse with whom you had nothing but years of frustration & disappointment, you probably wouldn't care to get dressed up or look your best. Why bother, right? I am betting the same is true in how you have cared for your house amidst all this lack of intimacy. Consider doing a deep cleaning--or, better yet, hire someone else to do it! A spa day for your house creates a fresh start and can help you feel it is indeed worth forging an intimate connection once again.